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Stress = Avoidance

There is an answer-method to stress avoidance.

If you have to do something you don’t like (something that causes stress), make up your mind what you are going to do/not do, deal with it, and accept the consequences. That reduces stress, end of discussion.

Sometimes doing something and sometimes doing nothing is correct. That is, you don’t always deal with something correctly by “dealing with it”; sometimes doing nothing is dealing with it correctly.

Once you have made up your mind what you are going to do (or not), do it and don’t waste emotion (get stressed) in going back and forth redeciding, just deal with it - do it! Once you have dealt with it, have the maturity to accept the consequences - good or bad.

At any moment you may “lose everything.” That always goes into the equation. Knowing this helps you reduce stress because you must always be aware that bad results can occur. Don’t have false hopes and don’t be negativistic. Deal with it one way or another and accept the consequences (good or bad).

You don’t have to like what you are doing, and you don’t have to like the results, but be prepared to accept the consequences either by way of success, which may be small-medium-large or failure, which may also be small-medium-large. If you are doing things correctly to avoid stress, much of the time you are not going to be too happy about the results. Life was not intended to be easy, and that is wherein the stress comes in: when you and I believe that it should be easier than it is. It is what it is, so accept it, get busy and deal with it, and accept the consequences. That’s how to avoid stress.


H. Robert Silverstein, M.D.
Hartford, CT


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